Jordan

Around this time last year I announced rather rashly that I was going to do a 78 mile long hike in aid of the Joseph Salmon Trust. In July I had to pay for that rash promise with blisters, sore muscles and aching bones. I was hoping we’d raise four or five hundred pounds for the trust, but we ended up raising well over six thousand pounds. And about £1500 of that came from the readers of the blog.

This isn’t another appeal for cash, for me to ask again after everyone has been so generous would be extremely rude and probably unproductive. I just wanted to let you know where some of that money has gone:

Twelve year old Jordan was found hanged in his bedroom by his 19 year old sister. Shortly beforehand he’d had an argument with her about who was going to walk their dogs. His family believe that he’d done it as a practical joke, but that it went tragically wrong. There was no evidence that he was troubled, and he had been talking enthusiastically about upcoming events.

Jordan’s mum, Carole, was at work when she got a telephone call from her daughter.

“She was hysterical,” Carole said. “All I could make out were the words ‘Jordan’, ‘ambulance’ and ‘dead’. I remember it so clearly. I was standing there and my legs just gave way and I ended up in a heap on the floor. I sat there for a good five minutes not able to move. Deep down I knew he had gone.”

Carole’s daughter moved out of the house shortly after Jordan’s death, too traumatized by what happened to cope with staying. Carole was left alone in what had been a busy and happy home.

“Even now, sometimes I still look out of the window at 3.30pm expecting to see him come in from school. It’s like he has gone to his friend’s for a few minutes. It’s like I’m looking down on someone else going through this, it doesn’t seem real. The thought of never seeing him again is just unbearable.”

For a while she considered suicide herself, but was helped struggle on by the help of her friends and family.

And this is where the Jospeh Salmon Trust came in. Carol is a single mum who works as a care assistant. She would have struggled to meet the costs of the funeral on her own.

“A headstone is so expensive and like most parents you don’t really make provisions for your child’s death. I’ve got life insurance but you don’t think about using it for your children – you don’t expect them to die before you.”

Neil has told me that because the charity’s bank account had been so boosted by the money raised by the walk they were able to pay for Jordan’s headstone; two thousand pounds that Carole would have found it hard to find otherwise. They were able to help Carole meet the final needs of her son, something invaluable in helping her cope with her grief.

It is testament to how important the Trust’s help was to Carol that she decided that she herself wanted to help raise funds for the charity. In a fundraiser at the village hall Carole, her daughter, and her friends raised £2200, which not only matched but exceeded the money the Trust gave her.

“In one respect I was so grateful to the trust because I just didn’t have the finances to be able to cover it.” said Carole “But in another way this was the last thing I could do for Jordan and I’m so happy that I can give this money to help someone who finds themselves in my position in future.”

I met Carole and her daughter the other day as I agreed to take some photo’s of them presenting a check to Neil to send to the local paper. The respect and admiration I have for them is immense. And while Carole has effectively “paid back” the money the Trust gave her, the charity would never have been able to grant her money in the first place if it wasn’t for the generous donations by people such as yourself. So thank you, you did what we set out to do – ease the burden of someone going through one of the worst torments imaginable.

All of the information I’ve given here is in the public domain and has been featured in the local paper. The details of people helped by the Trust is obviously usually confidential, but Carole herself chose to go public in order to publicize the charity. As I said, I’m not going to ask for any donations here, but if you went over to the Joseph Salmon Trust’s website I’m sure that they would.

trust

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16 Responses to Jordan

  1. Arjan says:

    very touching to hear how well the money is spend! It’s always good to see some concrete things that are being done.
    A great cause.

    Arjans last blog post..A shadow of myself

  2. Rol says:

    A moving story that makes all your blisters worthwhile. Well done again.

    On a completely unrelated note, that new header is freaking me out. Make it stop!!!

    Rols last blog post..Bye to Bagpuss

  3. Penelope says:

    What a truly sad story. We’re all very proud of you and what you did this Summer – wear your blisters with honour :o)

    Penelopes last blog post..That’s one way of doing it.

  4. bon bon says:

    so unbelievably heartbreaking. my heart goes out to carole and her daughter.

    bon bons last blog post..i could use some lights!

  5. VegasDad says:

    What a horribly tragic story. I can’t imagine losing a child in such a manner. The grief would certainly be overwhelming. I’m happy to hear your efforts (and all who contributed) helped out this family in their time of need. Carole and her daughter later raising money for the trust is truly inspiring.

  6. Avitable says:

    The tragedy notwithstanding, that’s outstanding to hear.

    Avitables last blog post..Masturbation that lasts the whole month of July . . . guaranteed

  7. I don’t know.

    Sometimes I have no idea how people can get up and carry on.

    I wish them the very best.

    Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..It walks like a duck, and talks like a duck, but…

  8. A truly heartbreaking story. Well done for all your efforts and you can be very proud of you aching bones.

    Kevin Spencers last blog post..Dear Neal Conan…

  9. Sam says:

    Good work. Its good to hear where the money went.

    Sams last blog post..How to Bypass NHS Waiting Lists

  10. gail says:

    At first I wondered what MY Jordan had been up to, but after reading that story I realised that no matter what they do, I would rather have him with me than have to go through what Carole went through.

    When you have kids of your own these things really hit the heart.

    A great cause Dan.

  11. Bec says:

    You Dan really are quite the magnificent man.

    And this is a magnificent cause – and I will be hopping over there to give money… as I was rubbish at doing it here!

    Becs last blog post..Testing…

  12. Oh wow. I dont even know what to say, except, wow. Amazing.

  13. Gary says:

    Stunned, thats what I am this morning. Neil’s work is so inspiring it just leaves me numb, I can’t say any more, thats a first isn’t it ?

    Garys last blog post..Snow days

  14. Dan says:

    Arjan – I thought people might have liked to see what was done with the money. Neil tells me he is helping three other families at the moment.

    Rol – I’m planning on updating the header early next year, but until then I’m afraid you’ll have to resign yourself to being freaked out.

    Penelope – I didn’t do much. It’s the Salmons who are the real heros.

    bon bon – It’s hard to fathom how they must feel after such a awful tragedy.

    VegasDad – It’s amazing how people emerge the other side of things like this determined to make it easier for others. As you say, truly inspiring.

    Avitable – Thanks, I hoped people would find it positive to hear how people have been directly helped by their donations.

    Xbox – Nor do I. In fact that’s a common thought I have at work. There’s something about the strength of human spirit I think; corny as it sounds.

    Kevin – They stoped aching about three days ago.

    Sam – Thanks.

    Gail – I’d forgotten your son was called Jordan too.

    Bec – I’m not magnificent, all I did was walk for a bit. It’s Neil and Rachael that are the magnificent ones.

    Movin’ down the road – There’s not much to say to stuff like this.

    Gary – To go through the loss of their child and emerge doing work like this is awe inspiring. and that’s not all Neil does either. He volunteers with the police helping with race relations cases and also is heavily involved with his church and the board of governors at his school. He’s a good man.

  15. PG says:

    terrible, yet wonderful. thanks for sharing. as small as it was i am so glad to have been able to pitch in.

    PGs last blog post..With Malice Toward None (319/365)

  16. Whit says:

    Heartbreaking. I’m glad the Trust was able to help out but I wish they didn’t have to. Awful stuff.

    Whits last blog post..Cup of Random: Regifting Ted Edition