Dec 10
on Dec 10 in Uncategorized by DanAs you will have already noticed, every day this month I have posted a new door from the All That Comes With It advent colander. If you haven’t noticed this then there’s probably something wrong with your computer. I should buy a new one immediately if I were you.
Any suggestions that I have only just thought of this idea and in truth there has been no advent door for the 1st to the 9th of December will be met with swift and aggressive legal action.
So, even though I have been doing this advent calendar thing for the past nine days, I haven’t explained the the theme behind it. Traditionally advent calendars have featured images of Christmas of yore. You know the type of thing: candy canes, bells, wooden toy trains, that sort of stuff. Nice as this may be it is hardly relevant to contemporary festive celebrations. When was the last time you actually had a gingerbread man hanging off your Christmas tree? Exactly.
So I decided to base my own advent calendar on something that sums up the real true spirit of Christmas: the cynical marketing of children’s toys by advertising executives.
But I’m not just looking at any old cynical marketing campaign, oh no. I’m focusing on a very specific form of the genre: namely the 30 minute long toy advertisements which were cunningly disguised as children’s television programs in the 1980′s and early 90s.
So without further ado:
[Open the door / Close the door]
M.A.S.K.
“M.A.S.K. crusaders, working all the time, fighting crime, fighting crime!”
The Mobile Armoured Strike Kommand (M.A.S.K.) were a hi-tec special task force of crimefighters. Their arch enemies were V.E.N.O.M. (Vicious Evil Network of Mayhem) lead by the dastardly Miles Mayhem. The main gimmick of the show was that all the characters had special vehicles that somehow transformed into other vehicles, all of which were available in your friendly neighborhood toy shop naturally. Some of the transformations were quite ingenious, others were very poor indeed. Thunderhawk, a car that turned into a plane by opening it’s gullwing doors was a particularly disappointing low point.
M.A.S.K. was full to the brim of every stereotype a young child could wish for. The Russan was called “Boris”, the Indian “Bombay”, and the villain had an English accent (always my own personal favorite). All good clean fun. I don’t think I ever had any M.A.S.K. toys, but my brother had Piranha: a motorbike that’s sidecar turned into a submarine. A mint condition boxed one would cost you $80 these days, that’s about £0.23 in English money (will these exchange rate jokes ever get stale? I very much doubt it).
The TV show only lasted one and a half seasons, but there are still devotees of it out there today. Check out Matt Trakker’s Mask Domain for all your M.A.S.K. related needs.
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Oh, and happy birthday to my Dad.
I think I still have some MASK figures around here somewhere.
a cousin of mine has some MASK toys left (if he hasn’t sold em). If he didn’t sell em, he probably should ask € prices ;)
Looking back the car might be dull, but as a kid it was just plain awesome haha.
“Kommand”. I always feel that there’s something very sinister about acronyms containing the letter ‘K’. Bet Werner Von Braun worked for them.
I totally remember that show. Funny.
I’m impressed with your colander making skills. I’m sorry it took me 10 days to say so.
That show completely worked on me. I had some ridiculous number of those toys, all of which I’m sure are landfill fodder now.
I thought that the motorbike grew helecopter blades, but I might be wrong.
You are wrong sam, as you so often are. Actually there was one that grew helecopter blades, but the one I remember best was the submarine.
the bike did (too)
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