The About Me page on this blog is pretty crappy. For a start it’s out of date; all the ages on it are wrong, my mugshot lacks a beard, and Evans occupation is listed as “cheekychops†when quite clearly it should be “snot monsterâ€. Even if it wasn’t behind the times it would still be bland and boring, I mean does anyone actually care that I like the tangy taste of creosote, sleeping with the fridge door open, and walking barefoot through graveyards? No, I didn’t think so.
In fact I’d go so far as to say that the poor quality of my about page is probably the sole reason that this blog has not yet garnered millions of adoring readers. It is the only thing holding me back from quitting my day job and living like a king from advertising revenues and lucrative book deals like Dooce, John Chow, and Bon Bon.
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Something clearly needs to be done, and I think I’ve stumbled across the answer. Whilst reading Contrary’s excellent blog the other day I noticed she had done something incredibly creative with her about page. Basically she asked her readers to give her a one or two sentence soundbite about her or her blog, a bit like the quotes on the back of a book or on the bottom of movie posters.
Seeing as though the comments on this blog are usually far more entertaining than the actual posts I thought that approach might work here too. I must point out that I’m not fishing for compliments; insults, name calling and general slander are encouraged too. You can write anything you want and I’ll publish it verbatim (within reason).
And as usual for posts that I am desperate for people to comment on there shall be a glittering prize for a randomly selected entrant. If the winner is of the foreign persuasion then they will relieve a parcel containing samples of the most pungent foodstuffs the UK has to offer - Marmite, English mustard, and Branston Pickle. If you are a glorious resident of the United Kingdom then you will receive a special yet to be determined mystery prize.
So, whether you are a regular commenter, a lurker, or even a first time visitor give it a go. You know you want to.
Dan is the kind of guy I could totally hang out with. Even if he does talk funny and threaten us furriners with pungent food stuffs.
Dan is a friend. He’s a friend’s friend too, even though I don’t know him (it says so right there on the internet). He’ll be your friend too… for a price.
“I don’t really know Dan, but he seems to be a nice person, and I wish him no specific harm.”
“This blog is what I turn to when I need to see exactly what my old Uni mate is up to. Shame the pictures never download properly for me.”
Mr Jones! I didn’t know you frequented these parts.
Daniel Hughes, convicted? No, never convicted.
or
Dan is all heart. Heart and Diet Coke.
“I’m just here because someone told me it was good.”
Dan is a clever writer and most excellent photographer who is always the first one to make fun of himself. There’s nothing better in my book than a Brit with wit.
He uses strange words like “verbatim”!
Dan is a reflective and captivating writer…who occasionally massacres the American language.
“Dan, Dan, he’s our man! If he can’t do it - a man in the yellow book can!”
“He may just be the sexiest bearded, Diet Coke drinking, hiking blog father out there.”
or
“All that comes with Dan is a boot full of wit”
I stumbled upon Dan’s blog quite frankly, by accident. Sometimes…the fall is worth it.
Dan? We don’t speak much anymore. Last I heard was that he spends all of his time locked in his cellar earning his readies by plugging diet coke over the internet.
Doesn’t the Dan Hughes Wiki say it all?!
I’d leave a comment but I’m too busy googling a Branston Pickle.
You may have heard about a chap named Dan who was born in Chester, England, to a Midshipman in the Merchant Navy, after which he trained at the Guildhall School of Music and Drama. He appeared in the film “The Power of One” and, after a series of fortunate and unfortunate roles, landed the coveted part of 007 in “Casino Royale”.
This is not that Dan.
Dan - the source of damn fine pickle recipes.
“And to his credit, blogger Dan never loses the heart of the tale. Even in the midst of an incredibly thrilling magical battle of whippeting wands, flashing light and furor, he focuses on Dan’s inner war. Will he give into the angry impulses that link him to All That Comes With It or find the love his mother implanted in his blood when she died to save him?”
To be perfectly honest I couldn’t think of anyway to say such grand wonderful things about this grand and wonderful blog so I may have just lifted the above soundbyte from a Harry Potter review… maybe.
Its read this or go out frightening people, I know which one my probation officer prefers ;-)
Apologies if I could have put a reply directly under yours Dan. I’m not down with all this technical stuff. I thought a blog was something that they rolled on in Canada…
Anyhugh, I do occasionally lurk, but was spurred into looking by Kerry texting me the other day re. you going to see Crowded House. Hopefully, I’ll stick around a bit more. Mind you, seeing as we’re moving house in a fortnight and baby coming in February, that could be wishful thinking of the highest order…
Branston Pickle and cheese on a freshly toasted crumpet. I heartily recommend that to anyone.
A fellow Yorkshireman, so thats a good start then …
If I have to choose between quality time with my family and reading Dan’s blog - I read Dan’s blog. Same goes for personal hygiene.
Dan has been kind enough to get me a book deal! (pending)
Dan’s blog: the header image says it all.
As a normal comment: I stumbled this way through Quit your day job. As you guessed..I really like your header image!!
I was thinking of doing something like that with my own blog(s): pics say more than words.
Of ALL the blogs I read, this is one of them!
Dan is my favorite Brit. And one of my favorite dudes with a beard. Isn’t that a good enough reason to read?
Warning: with mixed with Mentos, may cause eruption.
Can I just ask, is there a submissions limit here - because my brain is close to exploding?
First, I liked Dan’s blog. Then I liked Dan. Then I liked Dan’s family. Next, I’m planning on liking Dan’s country, as long as I don’t have to drive on it’s motorways.
from one narcissist to another, I’ve tagged you.
Dan: the original British bulldog.
After misdiagnosing myself as a psychopath, Dan was there to help me out. I am now happily living my life as a sociopath. Thank you, Dan.