College sports have never been as big in the UK as they seem to be in the States. Over here university sports teams are just thinly veiled excuses for the participants to consume twice their body weight in alcohol. It is very rare that they gather any support from their fellow students, and the numbers of spectators at their games can be counted on two hands. In fact the only sports team that I was aware of while at University was the woman’s rugby team, and that was only because there was a rumor spread that they could crush a man’s skull between their thighs.
But as far as I can gather in the USA college sports are big business. Particularly American football (you will find, I think, that is the correct term for the game). People turn out in their thousands to support the Wisconsin Meerkats play the Arkansas Pineapples in the regional semi heat finals. The prospect of those kind of numbers turning up to watch a university team in the UK play is unthinkable. The closest we get is the Oxford and Cambridge boat race; and even then most people only watch because they are secretly hoping one of the teams will sink.
I must admit though, I do have a rather large soft spot for American Football. In the early nineties there was an ill fated attempt to introduce the sport into Europe in the form of the World League. The game was fast paced, violent, and exciting and it thrilled the 15 year old me immensely. So enthused was I that I even stayed up until three in the morning to watch the 1992 superbowl between the Buffalo Bills and the Washington Redskins. It was only then that I realized that I had only ever seen the edited highlights of games, and now I was to witness a full length, four quarter game of gridiron.
My god it’s a slow game. They keep stopping all the time. Just pick up the ball and run with it to the other end damnit! I fell asleep before the third down.
After that I sort of stopped watching American football. But my romance with it hasn’t really ended. I think it’s something about the team names and the logos that really appeals to me. The national sport in the UK is football (that’s football, not bloody “soccer”. If you are going to use our language then at least make an effort to do so properly), and our team names are incredibly bland. My local side for example is Huddersfield Town which, while it earns full marks for geographical accuracy, is hardly inspiring.
No, I long for a Seahawk or a Falcon, a Bronco or a Colt. And so with that in mind I have decided to set up my own American Football team here in humble Huddersfield. Much like The Sneeze’s rock band The Tree Brains the team will be purely theoretical in nature. There will be no players, no stadium, and only a small select number of handpicked seventeen year old cheerleaders. But while it may not exist in reality, it will exist in our hearts.
I have already come up with a name and designed a totally arsekicking logo, both of which I shall unveil tomorrow. In the meantime however I invite you to take a guess at what the team name will be. There will be a SPECIAL PRIZE!! for the person who either guesses correctly or comes the closest to it.
Wow, isn’t this exciting.
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 1:47 am
My guess would have to be the Huddersfield Horns… it’s cheerleader related.
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 2:11 am
How many times can we guess?
I’m thinking “Huddersfield Hens.” Nah, too feminine. How about “Huddersfield Cocks.”
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 2:35 am
The West Yorkies.
Kirklees Kickers.
Market Town Marauders.
Huddersfield Millers.
Castle Hill Caretakers.
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 3:22 am
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 3:35 am
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 3:46 am
The Huddersfield Brigantes
The Huddersfield Worsted Woolies
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 4:14 am
The Huddersfield Paladins
The Huddersfield Barbarians
Or, possibly, in honor of the Huddersfield coat of arms:
The Huddersfield Rams
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 4:49 am
As for Huddersfield, perhaps you’re considering:
The Huddersfield Huggies
The Huddersfield He-Men
The Huddersfield Diet Cokers
The Huddersfield Bloggers
The Huddersfield Bananas
The Huddersfield Big Daddies
The Huddersfield Procreators
The Huddersfield Walla Wallas
Am I even close? :)
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 9:44 am
‘Barracudas’ has already been taken by the rugby lot.
‘Terriers’ is the nickname for Town.
‘Harriers’ was coined for a running club.
I reckon you’re going to choose something with a bit of heritage to it, so I’m going to opt for one of the following:
The Milliners
The Ramsdens
The Shoddies
The Mungoes
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 11:16 am
[...] have been squirting out of my nose as I was laughing so hard at The Real Dan’s post about American football and Lyssa’s take on Sea Monkeys and Deb’s offering of her dog to the highest bidder [...]
on Nov 14th, 2007 at 2:42 pm
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on Nov 14th, 2007 at 5:54 pm
Go Hogs! Sooie!
(I married into a Razorback family. We have to show the love.)
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on Nov 20th, 2007 at 3:43 pm
Sadly something like this just doesn’t exist in American college football. No, we get computer rankings and polls to tell us who is the better team.
Having the best teams play each other?
Silly!
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on Nov 20th, 2007 at 3:47 pm
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on Dec 28th, 2008 at 10:58 am
12th Mans last blog post..We Believe We Can Win It All Someday Soon!
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on Jan 4th, 2009 at 4:33 am
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on Jan 6th, 2009 at 4:07 pm
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on Jan 8th, 2009 at 6:37 pm
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