In a parallel universe I lead an organized life. I never forget a birthday, I always know where my car keys are, and all my CDs are in the right boxes. What’s more I record all my appointments in a diary, have regular haircuts, and the kids sometimes get to nursery in matching socks.
I admit that I sometimes wish that I was that organized parallel me. Perhaps then I would actually be able to find stuff when I needed it. But then again that version of me lives in an alternate reality where dinosaurs still roam the earth. It’s all very well being able to locate the receipt and guarantee for the kettle, but that doesn’t really help you when you are being pursued by a Velociraptor.
Over the past few months I have been tagged by fellow bloggers to do various memes. Sometimes I have done them pretty much immediately. But sometimes the urge to rant about Scottish five pound notes or bore everyone with tales of my childhood has overwhelmed me and I have consigned the tag to my “memes to do later” folder.
Unfortunately I don’t actually have a “memes to do” folder. What I have instead is an incredibly bad memory. It is not an effective substitute. As a result I’ve forgotten who tagged me with what. I know that I have two sets of questions to answer from Lee at Quit Your Day Job, 7 random things from Véronique over at Little Elephants, and someone tagged me with the my favorite restaurants meme but I can’t for the life of me remember who it was. I’m sure there are more but I’m drawing a blank.
I am designating next week an official International Week of the Meme, and I’d hate to be caught short. So if you have tagged me and I haven’t yet responded, or if you have any spare memes kicking around that you could donate to a good cause, then just let me know.
In order to get into the spirit of things I have decided to create my own meme.
The Every Which Way but Loose Meme.
The rules:
1. You are auditioning to be in the latest orangutan related comedy blockbuster: Dunston Checks In II: Return of the feces flinger.
2. The Screen Actors Guild restrict non-human primates to only three facial expressions in order that they are not used as cheap substitutes for actors such as Jean-Claude Van Damme and Rosanne Barr. These are: The Raspberry, the Head Shake, and the Face Slap.
3. Create an audition video exhibiting your talent in these three areas.
4. Try and persuade some other idiots to do it too
I tag everybody. But specifically Oli, Greg, Paul and Island Girl.
on Aug 5th, 2007 at 12:28 am
Hey!
This is an almighty coincidence. I was just thinking I’d get into videos on my blog this week. I recorded one today, in which I was trying on various different swimsuits. I was going to post it, and ask for reader opinions on which one was best.
But, I’ve hastily deleted that rubbish now, and I’m busily recording my monkey try-outs over the top!
You’re full of good ideas man!
I bet everyone will agree!
:)
on Aug 5th, 2007 at 5:27 am
Doh.
on Aug 5th, 2007 at 4:09 pm
Hi Dan. Hope all is well, and you are enjoying the nice weather.
I can’t believe how luxurious your beard is in the YouTube vid; kind of morphing into Brian Blessed, eh?
That is all.
Sandip.
on Aug 5th, 2007 at 9:52 pm
I guess that means I have to figure out videos then. Arse.
on Aug 6th, 2007 at 1:43 pm
What a coincidence. I was compiling a swimsuit video too!
Actually, I’m not sure I have the necessary kit to make a video. Nor the software.
I shall see what I can do
on Aug 6th, 2007 at 8:09 pm
Damn! I was going to redo our blog layout too and now it’ll look like we’re copying!
on Aug 6th, 2007 at 8:20 pm
No. It would look like you are copying, Bwa-ha-ha-ha.
on Aug 6th, 2007 at 8:56 pm
I would participate but I would never be able to compete with your exemplary acting skills. I’m afraid you’ve set the bar too high my friend.
on Aug 7th, 2007 at 5:11 am
That was hilarious. I laughed quite out loud.
on Aug 9th, 2007 at 1:45 pm