All that comes with it

Kerry and the kids have gone up to Scotland for the weekend to visit various family members and I have been left to my own devices. Don’t worry, I’m pretty sure that Kerry warned the emergency services before she left.

I’ve been looking forward to having three whole days to myself. No early mornings, no incessant macarenaing, no pooey nappies. And for a few days I won’t even have to blame the children for my deadly flatulence. Initially the plan was to make a big push on the garden, but the forecast is for rain for the next few days; and anyway I’ve managed to get a surprising amount done up there at the beginning of the week. So I’m home alone with absolutely no demands on my time or conduct.

There’s a nagging voice in the back of my mind telling me I should take the opportunity to de-evolve to my pre marriage ways. For most people this would probably mean copious amounts of wine, women, and song. But for me alas it would be more like beer, arguing about Star Wars in a dingy pub, and playing Civilization until three in the morning.

In some respects I miss those days. I’m not talking about sowing my wild oats. I never really went in for much of that sort of carry on, and anyway I’d be a fool not to realize that Kerry was the best thing that ever happened to me. No, I’m talking about the complete lack of responsibility and the vibrant and rich social life that I had in my early twenties.

But I have the opportunity to recapture that this weekend if I want to. I could go out round town with the lads and get completely off my face. I could spend my days nursing a hangover and my nights fueling the next one. I could. But I don’t really want to.

I know that will disappoint a few people; cause them to call me a wimp or a wuss. And I know that parenthood doesn’t mean the person that you used to be has to be buried under the weight of your responsibilities. It’s perfectly possible to lead the hip and hedonistic life and still be a good Dad.

But for me, that was then and this is now. I liked my life before I became a family man, but I simply love it now. As much as I kidded myself that I couldn’t wait to get a bit of time to myself this weekend, I knew deep down that as soon as Kerry, Amy, and Evan walked out the door I’d be counting the hours until they returned.

So I won’t be spending my days sitting idly around the house in my underpants this weekend. I’ll be cleaning and tidying, fixing and mending, and generally making myself useful . And not because I feel I have to, but because I want to do things to make my family’s lives just a little bit better.

And that’s what it’s all about really. All my hobbies and interests boil down to that little sentence. I mess about in the garden in an effort to improve our surroundings, I blog and take photos in order to record and remember, and I play Dungeons and Dragons because you never know when you are going to have to save your children from a marauding Orc.

It’s because I love them, and I’d never go back.