Ok, so it’s a slight departure from the usual family blogging, and many of these claims are pretty UK specific, but I’ve wanted to brag about some of them for ages.
- I have met someone who was treated for depression for 20 years by the world’s most prolific serial killer.
- I have seen Andy Crane’s penis
- I had a letter published in Whizzer and Chips
- One of our family friends has appeared on Top of the Pops, and another has released a duet with Ronan Keating
- I once saw Wilf Lunn on a bus to Brighouse
- My left arm was once on Countdown
- Bill Owen once gave me a chocolate éclair
- I know the girlfriend of the man who develops all of David Beckham’s personal photographs and snapshots.
But what I really want to know is what are your own brushes with greatness? I want everyone participating here, lurkers as well as the regular commenters. There is a spectacular prize for the winning entry – the exact nature of which is yet to be revealed.
I used to sell tickets at our local Showcase Cinema so we’d often see a cast member of Emmerdale or Coronation Street or a footballer but I managed one better.
One day it was so busy, you couldn’t see the end of the queue as it was round the building. I remember being rushed off my feet when I saw someone in a pale linen suit with a baseball cap on out of the corner of my eye. I remember thinking “who wears a baseball cap with a linen suit?” Patrick Stewart, that’s who! So my claim to fame is I sold Patrick Stewart and his brother tickets to see The Usual Suspects.
I’ve also met Stefan Dennis when he was in panto with a family friend, but I wasn’t as impressed as my mate who couldn’t talk, she was so excited!
When I was young and on holiday with my Mum (not sure why my Dad wasn’t there, work maybe?) Bob Monkhouse patted me on the head and told me I was a very polite young boy.
Paul
I think I deserve to win - I once met Grotbags - you remember Grotbags from the Pink Windmill with Rod Hull and Emu?
Helen
I rode from the 8th floor to the 1st in an elevator with the singer Smokey Robinson and his entourage.
Is this “brush with greatness” or “claim to fame”? I don’t really have a claim to fame, but I’ve ridden an escalator with Aerosmith. I talked about salt cellars with Alton Brown. I’ve shook Norm Abram’s big ass hand. I’ve been sweated on by Mr. “T” (I’ve never seen anyone sweat like that). If you’re a comic book geek I’ve had a fairly long chat with Paul Chadwick and Sergio Aragones did a sketch for me (he’s such a very nice guy he does sketches for everyone). My brother has been in films with Ben Affleck and Bruce Willis. I spent an evening in Anthony Rapp’s apartment in New York watching my brother do a reading. I had to hug Chubby Checker because he’s germophobic and wouldn’t shake my hand. I almost got on the same elevator as Sarah Jessica Parker. I spent a day as a “roadie” for Adrian Belew when he was playing with The Bears.
I’ve got more, but one of my favorites is Michael Stipe sang an entire song to me. Back in college I was in the front row at an R.E.M. concert and I don’t remember the song, but I remember he stared at me the entire time. I thought I was hallucinating until my friends all said, “Dude! He stared right at you through that whole song!”
Being sweated on by Mr T is rather impressive. I hope you weren\’t trying to get him on no plane fool.
It’s a shame that your Aerosmith and Deb\’s Smokey Robinson experiences weren\’t combined - it would be rather nifty to have ridden an elevator with Aerosmith. Love on an escalator doesn\’t have the same ring to it somehow; you\’d fall off when it got to the top for one thing.
I take your point about claim to fame vs. brush with greatness. I suppose I really meant the latter. Nothing’s ever right for you is it Greg. I’ll amend the post.
Well, the whole of me was on Countdown!
Ooo, I forgot. The newsman Tom Brokaw shook my hand and congratulated me when I graduated magna cum laude from college with a double major. He did not shake hands with the “normal” graduates.
You know, when you get more than three months out of college, you don’t get to bring up the honors graduation anymore, so thank you kindly for this opportunity.
boy, i’m thinking greg has won before i even start this…
i waited at the gate in o’hare with Muhammad Ali. this was just several years ago, so his parkinson’s was pretty bad, never the less, he was entertaining children and adults by doing small “illusions” with a handkerchief. he boarded the same plane as i, only he flew first-class (of course).
next, Dave Grohl save my child’s life. we took our two sons to their first major concert, foo fighters and red hot chili peppers, 7-8 years ago. glenn and i stayed towards the back, but the boys went down in the thick of the mosh pit. mid-song, dave stopped everything to ask everyone to back off and give this young man some breathing room as he could see he was being crushed. cub told me later it was him. i’d like to take this opportunity now to thank dave. oh, and ask him to send me some of his used chewing gum as a momento.
Thanks to Kerry for reminding me….
A couple of years back, I was on a date with a fair maiden, and we went to the Tate Modern. She was a member, so we got into the ‘members only’ cafe, and we decided to have our drinks on the balcony outside.
Seated in a large group on the table next to us, and not saying much at all, was one Steven Spielberg.
This burgeoning relationship clearly could not overcome such an over-arching brush with fame, and two dates later, it was over. Not sure what happened to Spielberg though…
You may have been a countdown contestant Rob, but it was the brief glimpse of my arm while I was sitting in the audience watching you that everyone was talking about the next day.
I still get fan mail about it, and Channel four approached me about being one of the talking heads on Richard Whitley’s obituary program.
Don’t worry too much about Greg having already won Bon Bon; I have developed an intricate judging system using complex algorithms and a highly sophisticated prioritising system. You win big points for having a celebrity save the life of one of your loved ones, it’s only a shame there wasn’t sharks involved.
There’s all to play for and I know for certain I have a few more regular readers who haven’t contributed yet. So far we have seven contestants, so we’re tantalisingly close to the John Hegley book winging its way to a lucky winner.
Will it be contestant number one, who “made it so” for a certain cinema goer?
Will it be contestant number two, who in adulthood appears to have lost any semblance of his polite childhood self?
Will it be contestant number three, who might have met Croc and that robot man as well for all we know?
Will it be contestant number four, who appears to highjacked this competition in order to brag about her academic achievements?
Will it be contestant number five, whose hobbies appear to include the collecting of bodily fluids of members of the A Team?
Will it be contestant number six, who neglected to tell us that he used to work for Edwina Curry?
Will it be contestant number seven who thinks a man with Parkinson’s attempting to put his handkerchief back in his pockets passes as children’s entertainment? (A little bit tasteless that one, I apologise).
Or will it be someone who is yet to come forward? Only time will tell.
Right, the gloves are off now!! My memory is also a bit off as well….
Worked for Radio 5 Live, Edwina Currie’s show. This brought me brushes with various celebs, and I would like to highlight Tony Robinson and…others.
Worked on The Really Useful Show at the Beeb. Less fame-brushing than you might think, though I did swap Grand National tips with Willie Carson.
Volunteered as a stand-in contestant for Telly Addicts on the run-through before the main recording. So met his Noelness.
Various quiz show appearances have brought me into contact with Richard Whiteley, Carol Vorderman,Geoffrey Durham, Tom O’Connor, Terry Wogan, Dale Winton, Krishnan Guru-Whatsit, William G Stewart, Bradley Walsh, and one of the Eggheads.
Aaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
My claims to fame are:
I once had lunch with Nicholas Parsons. For real, when I lived in Bristol, he was guest of honour at Bristol Chamber of Commerce and he in turn invited me.
I once had my hair cut by Johnny Marr’s ex-hairdresser.
I have stood close enough to Anthony H Wilson to see the contents of his overcoat pocket.
I once asked John Cooper Clarke if I could write his autobiography.
(btw I used to work with Kerry and my partner and I accompanied you to see the Bare Naked Ladies - top gig!)
Rob Rob Robby Rob Rob.
Three words: Andy Crane’s penis.
Anyhow, half those claims to fame are purely atributable to the fact you are a complete quiz geek who reads the Big book of British Hit Singles cover to cover every night before he goes to sleep.
Still, the sheer volume of B list celebrities you’ve met does score you quite a few points.
Complex algorithms and a highly sophisticated prioritising system?
THAT’S CODE FOR CHEATING!
Did I mention that I almost knocked over and head-butted Brian Mulroney, former Prime Minister of Canada?
Let’s see what your algorithms do with that!
Strangely enough Morticia, if that is indeed your real name, Paul and Becky (of Bob Monkhouse and Roy Castle fame) went to that gig too - although I didn’t know them at the time.
It was the third best gig I’ve ever attended, after They Might be Giants at the Bradford Rio and U2 at Manchester evening news arena.
Greg, I am afraid to tell you that Prime Ministers of Canada do not qualify as famous and therefore your claim is invalid.
In addition, because you have made this error, the complex algorithms and a highly sophisticated prioritising system has deducted 48 points from your total, placing you in twelfth place. I am sorry Greg, but it is out of my hands.
this may come off as my sounding like an american prude, Rob, but who are all those people!?
Deb, does Tom Brokaw lisp in person?
i have several more encounters i’d like to add…
1)met, spoke to AND have autographs of Jack and Meg White.
2)at a book signing, David Sedaris came on to my oldest son, Luke (which i have the autograph to prove)
3)i have kissed Bruce Campbell on the cheek
in honor of this monster you have created, Dan, i’ll post that photo on my blog in about 6 hours. (the boss looks down upon my blogging at work. go figure.)
in your face, Brian Mulroney. i’ve got a few other names i’m keeping under my hat should anyone pull out the big guns and i need to up my quoto.
Well I had to have a go too - Kerry & I sat on the next bench to Mike Leigh at the V&A (but she had to tell me who he was). My brother-in-law’s goddaughter (the same family friend who introduced Kerry to Stefan Dennis) has appeared with Freddie Starr and Siegfried & Roy and her mother, my sister’s longest friend, won 2 episodes of Opportunity Knocks. I went to school with a Bunny Girl who went on to live with Hugh Hefner. I work at the prison where Leslie Grantham (Dirty Den) started his acting career. I sat next to Gordon McQueen on a flight to Dublin, when he was coach at Middlesborough and asked him if he had something to do with football (I think I still have the mark where Archie’s elbow hit my ribs). At a friend’s party I asked Gaynor Faye if she was doing OK, thinking I knew her, not realising it was from Coronation St at the time and her mother Kay Mellor is distantly related to my mate Keith but I think my utmost claim is that good friends were the owners of the white kitten as seen with the Post Office tower in the Goodie’s sketch. Will I just collect the book when we next visit Dan?
PS - My son-in-law’s blog was once featured on the BBC’s web page
Blimey - that Goodies one is a belter (it will most likely mean nothing to the Americans however).
That is our ten contestants folks. But all that means is that someone is definitely going to win the prize; there is still room for more entrants if you care to come out of the woodwork. And should those that have already participated suddenly remember that their brother is Tom Cruise then feel free to dive back into the fray.
Perhaps I should set a closing date, how does 11:59pm (British Summer Time) on Sunday the first of October sound?
Please dont be put off if you think that you have no chance of winning, or you think your claim is rather tenuous. The prize is merely a bribe to encourage those more mercenary souls to participate.
I was with bon bon and took a picture of Ali in the airport.
Melissa Etheridge told me I had nice boots at least I think she said boots! My sister is friends with Victor Delorenzo’s(drummer from the Violent Femmes)sister.Our family friend is the the batting coach for the KC Royals. I’ve met Eric Buell of Buell Motorcycles and have his signature on my bike.
I can’t compete with such high-flyers but…
Back in my “would-be rock star” days I met Robert Smith from the Cure and my band’s track on a compilation album caused Record Mirror to proclaim us as “the band most likely…”. (They never said what exactly.) I met “Mersey Sound” poets Roger McGough (also in The Scaffold of “Lily the Pink” fame) and Brian Patten and though I never met their compadre Adrian Henri before he died, he did once sit next to me in the Cornerhouse cinema in Manchester and smelled so bad that I had to move.
But Dan, your Kate Rusby connection knocks all these into a cocked hat for a muso like me. Award yourself the John Hegley and be done with these imposters! ;-)
Ok, here you go:
i) A minion who used to work for me has appeared as a victim on the hilarious bbc hidden camera comedy show “Just For Laughs”
ii) I have kissed dead playwright Joe Orton’s sister and given her a big bunch of flowers.
iii) Henry Cooper once picked me up.
iv) I have interviewed Susie Dent, who sometimes appear on Countdown in dictionary corner.
v) I saved Michael Stipe’s life by finding a spent bullet whilst cleaning a football stadium after an REM gig. (Technically finding the bullet didn’t save his life, but you have to look at the bigger picture).
vi) I missed meeting the entire Leeds United football team by not going to work that day (on purpose).
vii) I missed meeting Nell McAndrew who was dressed as Lara Croft by not going to work that day (by accident).
viii) My step dad used to play cricket with someone who appeared in Emmerdale Farm whose name I forget.
ix) My Dad would sometimes say “hello” to Wilf Lunn.
x) I got a part in a college play because the girl who used to be on Jonny Briggs and said “My Mum who is a nurse” dropped out.
x) I got a part in a college play because the girl who used to be on Jonny Briggs and said “My Mum who is a nurse†dropped out.
Surely that would be a womans part? Did you wear a dress?
I think I leave that one to the philosophers.
Neil and I sat behind Leslie (Naked Gun) Nielsen on a train to London.
My sister and I have met Jamie Oliver although Amy was too scared to speak to him.
I have met Jools Holland, Richard Whiteley, Mike Morris and Christine Talbot* (I have been to Christine’s house!).
And, my proudest ever claim to ultimate fame, I have had a limerick read out on Wake up to Wogan!
I once bowled with Nelly. He beat me by one point.