You may think this looks like a photo of two devilishly hansom men enjoying a leisurely meal; but you’d be wrong. Not about the devilishly hansom bit obviously, no these prime hunks of man meat are the very pinnacle of aesthetic perfection. But that is no light lunch that they are having. No, it’s an excruciatingly painful exercise in misplaced machismo and general foolhardiness.
The Quaker Steak and Lube is an American chain of restaurants specializing in buffalo wings and other nutritionally dubious foodstuffs (and very delicious it all is too). It has a couple of gimmicks. The first is an automotive decor them,; and the second is the spiciness of some of it’s food.
The heat of chilli peppers is measured in something called SHU (that’s Scoville Heat Units in case you’re really interested). A bell pepper is about 100 SHU, Cayenne pepper is 30,000, and the “Atomic wing sauce” at Quaker Steak and Lube is a whopping 150,000 SHU.
Ever since Greg saw the Atomic wing sauce on the menu he has been tempted to try it; but it took the visit of a fellow idiot from across the pond for him to take the plunge.
Blimey those buffalo wings are hot. Sweat inducing face reddening hot. Greg even swore that he could feel his ear wax melting. We ordered five, ate two each, and neither of us could face the remaining one (even though to do so would have put the score at 3 – 2, crowning the consumer the ultimate chilli champion). After about ten minutes of nothing but frantic blinking and tiny whimpering noises we finally pulled ourselves together enough to agree that we would never attempt anything quite so foolish again. Next time we want to prove our manliness to each other we’ll just go straight to smashing our heads together like rutting stags rather than go through all that again.
On another food related note I’m fairly sure that our week long visit here has put me back about two months on my weight loss campaign. But you know what? I don’t care. I’m on holiday damnit and there’s Baby Ruth chocolate bars and cheesecake to eat. I’ll get back on the wagon when we return home on Tuesday, in fact I’m going to step it up a bit in preparation for the Cumbria Way at the end of May. But for now I’m cramming my mouth with grease and fat and caressing my increasing rotund stomach with the satisfied pride of a pregnant lady.
Life is good.
No related posts.
Looks and sounds like you are all having a great time. Happy Easter to you all – and there’s another excuse to eat some more and enjoy (I know we are going to!) – as you say that’s what holiday time is for.
Will you get to eat Cadbury Creme Eggs while you’re here, too? I know that of course Cadbury is from the UK, but do they do the whole creme and caramel egg thing?
Avitables last blog post..New Guerilla Advertising Technique: Bag O’ Rocks
It’s too bad you are not here is the US during state fair season (July- September). That is where you find both the apex and nadir of Amurrican food (sometimes on the same plate). Batter dipped deep fried candy bars. Funnel cakes. Meat products of every description.
Here’s a searchable database of the food available at the Minnesota State Fair:
http://gopher.mnstatefair.org/foodfinder/
Everything from Alligator (breaded, deep fried and seasoned) to Zeppoles (another word for fried dough with sugar).
Alligator kind of reminds me of swordfish in taste and consistency, BTW.
Grandma – I had cookie cereal for breakfast this morning. The ultimate in decadence.
Avitable – We certainly do. In fact we brought a carton for creme eggs over with us for Greg and Deb’s kids.
JJ Daddy O – I’ve had crocodile in the past, I thought it was a cross between fish and pork.
ah an eating match always proves manliness, although drinking copious amounts of beer and wrestling also works.
It doesn’t matter if you tie..that’ll just improve the manliness bond.
That’s how I roll too.
Arjans last blog post..Autorai 2009 (If I had a billion dollars)
With a post title like that I expected much more. Very disappointed I must say. Going to restaurants here in the US is really not in the best interests of weight loss. My family always crack up at the portion size when I take them out to eat when they cross the pond.
Kevin Spencers last blog post..Blogadministrivia
I want the hot stuff.
Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..Beyond here lies nothin’
The Midwest US is not a place for dieters. But who cares when you get hot wings?
Jamess last blog post..One Color He Can Wait to Learn
Actually “Wisconsin” means “covered with cheese” in Chippewa.
I too have succumbed to the siren song of the super spicy. I love spicy food, but every now and then I find myself dancing dangerously close to, and even over, my limits. It’s enough to send me running for a glass of milk and to keep my humility in check.
Holmess last blog post..Messiah Bling and other Religious Hilarity
What amazes me is the way you can ‘train’ yourself to eat spicy food. Before I met my other half I was a proper ‘korma curry for me thanks’ wuss and could barely eat a jalapeno.
Jim makes a mean chili and over the past 4 years has been slowly upping the quantity of peppers he puts in there (we’re talking scotch bonnet here – heavy stuff) and now I’m one of those people who puts extra chili sauce on my jerk chicken when I go to the Notting Hill Carnival because it ‘isn’t spicy enough’.
Give yourself a few years and some intensive chili workouts and you may well be able to claim that ‘Chili King’ title in a rematch…
LBBs last blog post..Songs of Praise