Cluck me

It was my birthday on Sunday. It’s a little known fact that, just like wedding anniversaries, people’s ages are associated with certain gifts. But instead of useless stuff like gold, diamonds, rubies and the like, birthdays are linked to actually useful things.

For example 32, was my iPod Touch birthday. And a jolly nice one it was too. This year however I am 33. And as we all know 33 is the year of the chicken coop.

Kerry didn’t buy me a chicken coop for my birthday. I can’t imagine why. Yes it’s true that she has some pretty strong opinions against us getting chickens. And it’s also true that we can’t really afford to buy one, what with saving up for our holiday in the States and everything. But it was my 33rd birthday for goodness sake, getting a chicken coop on your 33rd is embedded into the natural cultural traditions of Great Britain. If you go against that then you may as well just go ahead and cancel Christmas while you’re at it.

But then I got to thinking. Kerry turned 33 in September and I didn’t buy her a chicken coop either. Here I am thinking ill of my wife when I am as much to blame as she is. How could I be so thoughtless? I had to make amends.

So look what I just bought on ebay:

coop

Actually I didn’t officially buy it; Kerry did.

You see I’ve been banned from ebay for about four years. My credit card expired and left me owing them 28p in sellers fees. Being the lackadaisical slacker I am I never got round to paying it, and consequently the full weight of ebay’s blacklisting wrath descended upon me.

Still Kerry’s account is still valid. Until I muck that up with my slackness as well obviously. There’s nothing quite like ruining your wife’s online reputation to give you that certain spring in your step.

So if there is a moral to all this it is: Keep your spouse close, but keep your ebay password closer. Think on ladies and gentlemen, think on.

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16 Responses to Cluck me

  1. Arjan says:

    said it yesterday, but here again: congratulations!
    But I guess this means the egg seller down the road *..referring to the Evan dropping eggs post* will be out of business now..

  2. Donna says:

    Wow, I don’t know much about chickens but that is one cool-ass chicken coop!

    (I was going to say it was “a cute little chicken house,” but I thought you might think that sounded too girly, so I tried to “man” it up a bit.)

    Will you paint it?

    -Donna

  3. Whit says:

    Did I ever tell you we raised chickens when I was a kid? They didn’t have any lodging that uppity. They were humble, country chickens.

    Happy belated.

    Whits last blog post..Does This Mean No Surprise Party?

  4. Idaho Dad says:

    Happy Birthday. I bought something for you, but then I ate it in a fit of temporary depression. Sorry.

    Idaho Dads last blog post..Where Have All The Flowers Gone

  5. Arjan says:

    how many chickens are you gonna buy btw?

    Arjans last blog post..Boterkoek (buttercake..)

  6. Absolutely bang-on. And that looks like the Rolls Royce of chicken accommodation.

    I was looking into it for the summer, found a company called omelet – or similar – that supply an easy to move coup, chickens and even training it you want it. But perhaps I’m shooting a full 365 early as I will ONLY be 32.

    Do keep us updated with your fowl progress.

    SingleParentDads last blog post..Poorly Boys

  7. Avitable says:

    Happy clucking birthday.

    Avitables last blog post..Blowjob imitator

  8. Thirty three. Something unpleasant happened to Jesus when he was thirty three, I think. I was quite relieved to reach 34 unscathed. If you hear the sounds of hammers and nails coming form the coop late one night, gather your family and run like hell.

    (un)relaxeddads last blog post..This is what snow looked like when I was five

  9. Rol says:

    Belated birthday greetings – you need to edit the Who Am I? section now.

    There are more than enough chickens round here without you getting a load too. And what will your friend, the huge canal duck, think?

    Rols last blog post..Worst Winter Blog Post Since 2008!

  10. James says:

    Happy Birthday. You are clucking insane.

    Jamess last blog post..Love Sick Blues

  11. I was almost sure that 33 was the crucifixion birthday.

    Xbox4NappyRashs last blog post..Hope floats

  12. VegasDad says:

    Happy Birthday. Nice chicken crib.

    VegasDads last blog post..wow…he actually wrote something

  13. JJ Daddy-O says:

    It’s a good thing you got a nice one, since when the Little Woman finds out you’ve been messing about on ebay, you may be rooming with Chicken Little.

  14. Holmes says:

    Happy birthday, and happy chicken-farming.

    Holmess last blog post..365 # 149: William T.

  15. Tina says:

    That is a very sharp looking chicken coop. Nothing can beat having fresh eggs in the morning, especially real ones, and not the factory-farmed fake ones I end up getting all the time. I miss farm living.

  16. Henri says:

    Have you never heard the phrase “In the doghouse”? Destroy that coop as soon as humanly possible. Either that or fit a barcalounger in it STAT. Oh and Happy Birthday Dan!

    Henris last blog post..In Case of Recession: Make This Pasta